Two years ago I woke up with my very first migraine headache. It turned out to be the first of many, many migraines to come. Thus began a journey which has required fortitude, courage, faith, and the expertise of several gifted doctors (thank you Dr. Green & Dr. Will!). I’ve had my ups and downs, and I’ve grown as a person throughout this ordeal. Honestly I would have to write a book to tell you all the lessons of the journey—but in this article let me share just one: Roller Coaster faith is no faith at all.
Roller Coaster faith is the kind of faith that goes up and down, up and down, up and down. It’s almost completely dependant upon present circumstances. Here’s the scenario: God speaks to you about your situation (through a Scripture, through a friend, or even through an article like this), and you’re greatly encouraged and riding high on the wings of faith. Then symptoms hit you like a baseball bat across the forehead and you find yourself in the depths of despair. But because God is faithful, he speaks to you again about your situation. He greatly encourages you, and you are joyful and confident in His word. Nothing is going to shake you this time! That is until your circumstances get rocky again—then you find yourself sinking to the depths of despair.
This cycle is called, “Roller Coaster faith” (so named by me), and it will make you double minded and bankrupt of any genuine faith. It’s definitely a ride you want to get off! Why? (other then the fact it’s making you miserable). Because even though God is faithful to continue to encourage you with His voice and His word—He wants you to grow in your faith. He wants you to be able to receive from Him easily, without struggle and striving.
Here’s a perfect example of Roller Coaster faith, taken from the book of Exodus. It’s amusing to see just how much like the Israelites we really are. While God was trying to free them from the bondage of Egypt, they vacillated between hope, and doubt. Here’s a short synopsis:
HOPE - God announces that there will soon be freedom from the slavery in Egypt. The Israelites respond: “And when they heard that the Lord was concerned about them and had seen their misery, they bowed down and worshiped.”
DOUBT – After Moses confronts Pharaoh, Pharaoh increases the Israelite’s hard labor. The Israelites say venomously to Moses: “May the Lord look upon you and judge you! You have made us a stench to Pharaoh and his officials and have put a sword in their hand to kill us.”
HOPE - God spares the Israelites from the last plague of death, and they finally leave Egypt. The Bible tells us: “the people bowed down and worshiped.”
DOUBT – The Egyptians chase the Israelites to Red Sea. The Israelites say to poor, beleaguered Moses: “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die?”
HOPE - God parts the Red Sea and saves Israel! The next thing we know: “Miriam took a tambourine and all the women followed her with tambourines and dancing. ‘Sing to the Lord for he is highly exalted.”
DOUBT - The people are thirsty, so…: “The people grumbled against Moses, saying ‘What are we to drink?’”
HOPE - Then God provides water and the Israelites are happy and confident again.
DOUBT – The Israelites get hungry in the desert. Now they are back to grumbling and doubting. They say to Moses (who has the patience of Job): “you have brought us out into this desert to starve this entire assembly to death.”
HOPE – But God gives them manna, and they are happy.
DOUBT – Then as they travel around in the desert, they get thirsty again. They say to Moses: “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children die of thirst?”
HOPE – But God provides water, and they are happy.
DOUBT – Moses is a long time on Mt Sinai getting the Ten Commandments. While he’s up there the Israelites say: “Come make us gods (idols) who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.” Idol worship and revelry followed—and as the Message translations puts it, “It turned into a wild party”.
I find it interesting and alarming that circumstances deteriorated so fast for the Israelites: They went from doubt, to fear, to grumbling, to complaining, to false accusations, and finally to idol worship and a wild party (and yes, everything which that implies). I used to think the opposite of “faith” was “fear”. Now I know; the opposite of “faith” is “idol worship”. Faith is an unwavering trust in God’s goodness in spite of present circumstances. Idol worship is seeking relief from our trials and suffering apart from God and His ways.
The lesson of the last two years of my life (backed up by this outline of Exodus) is that when God speaks to you—believe Him! Take Him at His Word. Write down the things He speaks and meditate on them morning, noon, and night. Keep them taped to your bathroom mirror. Keep His Word in front of your face until your trial has come to an end. You have to be willing to hold on to the promises of God tenaciously. Be a spiritual pit bull. Lock your jaw around those promises and don’t let go until they are fulfilled. It may take a while, and you may have to make some changes in your life. It may mean some repentance, and you’ll definitely have to do things God’s way. But eventually God’s Word will come to pass. Trust Him! He is 100% faithful, 100% of the time.
Paula Friedrichsen is a member of Church on the Mountain, a vibrant community of believers in Crowley Lake. We meet at 9:30 Sunday mornings. Call for more information: 935-4272 or www.ChurchOnTheMountain.org
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Road Trip! by Leyla Williams
Do you remember ski trips, or long drives to visit family that meant jumping in the car and settling in for a drive that you expected would be an adventure? Sometimes these trips included people you didn’t know yet. Every year I went on ski trips with a mix of people that I knew, and plenty I did not. Confined for a distance in a car with people that you don’t know very well, when you first click in, can feel intimidating. What are you going to say for the next 6 hours (or most recently, 17 hours)! But from each trip, I would come back with a new list of phone numbers and there would be inside jokes and memories that marked the best parts of the journey.
Discovering God in His Word and in prayer is very similar. Once you snap into your seat of devotional time, if you aren’t used to keeping company with God for extended periods of time, you might feel nervous. What are we going to say to each other? You might feel pressure to keep the whole conversation going. Relax. Jesus is a great travel companion and He has a ton to say.
A set devotional time will become the favorite part of your day once you get the hang of just enjoying Jesus and navigating your day with Him. In Psalm 139, David describes this intimate truth: “You know when I sit and when I stand up,...You are so familiar with all my ways that before I speak even a word, Lord, you know all about it already.” (Psalm 139:2,4). Only a best friend or spouse can get close to this synchronized fellowship. Jesus, like our closest companions in life, can finish our sentences. He is the one who searches our hearts and knows exactly what the Spirit is thinking (Romans 8:26).
Meet up with Jesus in a special place. There is something private about a car that makes people feel safe and able to open up quickly. There are no distractions and usually requires only the maintenance of making sure you are still heading in the right direction (does this make me a dangerous driver?). Think of a place you can regularly relax and make memories with Jesus without distraction. Maybe that would be your deck with a cup of coffee in hand, your drive to work, or a walk on a trail. Spend time wondering about Jesus. Start with His word. As you read, you’ll be reminded of how He thinks and how He loves you. Use His word to begin thanking Him, and then move on to asking for Him to govern a situation in your life. Write down verses that really stand out to you on little cards that you can meditate on throughout your day.
Like anyone else you would take a trip with, get to know His story, His dreams, His thoughts about life. Praying is not a ritual. Praying is personal. Every prayer affirms that you deem Jesus worthy of attention and value Him. You value His help for your concerns, but you also value knowing Him as someone you love. It would be very lonely if my husband, kids, or close friends only talked to me when they needed something. I love them and am happy to help, but just making memories together is equally valid and necessary in having a relationship. Learning about His heart energizes mine every day and He is wonderful company. Strike up a conversation, He is already buckled in.
Leyla Williams is a member of Church on the Mountain, a vibrant community of believers in Crowley Lake. We meet at 9:30 Sunday mornings. Call for more information: 935-4272 or www.ChurchOnTheMountain.org
Discovering God in His Word and in prayer is very similar. Once you snap into your seat of devotional time, if you aren’t used to keeping company with God for extended periods of time, you might feel nervous. What are we going to say to each other? You might feel pressure to keep the whole conversation going. Relax. Jesus is a great travel companion and He has a ton to say.
A set devotional time will become the favorite part of your day once you get the hang of just enjoying Jesus and navigating your day with Him. In Psalm 139, David describes this intimate truth: “You know when I sit and when I stand up,...You are so familiar with all my ways that before I speak even a word, Lord, you know all about it already.” (Psalm 139:2,4). Only a best friend or spouse can get close to this synchronized fellowship. Jesus, like our closest companions in life, can finish our sentences. He is the one who searches our hearts and knows exactly what the Spirit is thinking (Romans 8:26).
Meet up with Jesus in a special place. There is something private about a car that makes people feel safe and able to open up quickly. There are no distractions and usually requires only the maintenance of making sure you are still heading in the right direction (does this make me a dangerous driver?). Think of a place you can regularly relax and make memories with Jesus without distraction. Maybe that would be your deck with a cup of coffee in hand, your drive to work, or a walk on a trail. Spend time wondering about Jesus. Start with His word. As you read, you’ll be reminded of how He thinks and how He loves you. Use His word to begin thanking Him, and then move on to asking for Him to govern a situation in your life. Write down verses that really stand out to you on little cards that you can meditate on throughout your day.
Like anyone else you would take a trip with, get to know His story, His dreams, His thoughts about life. Praying is not a ritual. Praying is personal. Every prayer affirms that you deem Jesus worthy of attention and value Him. You value His help for your concerns, but you also value knowing Him as someone you love. It would be very lonely if my husband, kids, or close friends only talked to me when they needed something. I love them and am happy to help, but just making memories together is equally valid and necessary in having a relationship. Learning about His heart energizes mine every day and He is wonderful company. Strike up a conversation, He is already buckled in.
Leyla Williams is a member of Church on the Mountain, a vibrant community of believers in Crowley Lake. We meet at 9:30 Sunday mornings. Call for more information: 935-4272 or www.ChurchOnTheMountain.org
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
The 3 Symptoms of Unforgiveness by Paula Friedrichsen
Unforgiveness is like smelly trash—it tends to build up: Yesterday a few coffee grounds and an overripe cantaloupe sat rotting in the bottom of the kitchen trash can, and it began to smell. Add last night’s chicken bones, leftover pasta salad, and an empty cat food can, and its worse. Smash it down and throw in today’s orange peels, egg shells, and spoiled salsa. The trash can is overflowing and stinking up the whole house!
Unforgiveness is the trash that can smell up your marriage. Even though hurt feelings make it tempting to hold a grudge, it’s important not to let grievances build up. You have to take out the trash, so to speak. The secret to forgiveness is to not wait until you feel like forgiving; because frankly, you probably never will. Instead, decide to forgive. Below you'll find three symptoms of unforgiveness, as well as solutions to tossing it out of your life.
Symptom 1: A hard heart
Your spouse tells you they’re depressed about work, and you think, Whatever… She tells you the doctor say her cholesterol is dangerously high, and you think, Whatever… He tells you he thinks he may be having a mental breakdown, and you think, *yawn* Whatever… The inability for a marriage partner to care about what concerns their spouse is a screaming symptom that unforgiveness has caused their heart to grow cold.
But there’s a Solution. Although you may be tempted to harden your heart toward your husband or wife because they repeatedly hurt your feelings, make an effort to stay in an attitude of forgiveness. Remind yourself that you love your spouse! You may not be feeling deeply loving toward them right now—but choose to make the decision to love and care about what concerns them, in spite of a lack of romantic feelings.
Symptom 2: The silent treatment (also known as the “I’m not punishing him, I’m just not talking to him right now” treatment).
The silent treatment is usually an indicator that a husband or wife has a rap sheet of their spouses past offenses tucked in their hip pocket. In fact, their mate’s behavior has so infuriated them, they have no words left. You could interrogate them for hours under a glaring spotlight in a dingy, smoke-filled room—they’re not talking.
The Solution: Talk… communicate…share…open up. In my twenty-five years of marriage my husband and I have seldom had major change without conflict. If you’re in the habit of giving the silent treatment, begin today to humble yourself, open up, and communicate freely.
Symptom 3: Expecting the worst
As another offense is committed, the husband or wife is almost glad because it’s one more that can be added to an already long list. They’ll pull that list out at an advantageous moment to use as proof of their spouses continual disregard for their feelings.
An attitude of unforgiveness will set us up to expect the worst in our husband or wife. And when we expect the worst, it’s often exactly what we get. Expecting the worst can become like a well-traveled road—it’s familiar, it’s safe, and it protects us from being disappointed…again.
The solution lies in seeking God’s perspective on your mate and “choosing” to search for the good in your husband or wife.
If you’ve found it difficult to forgive in the past—I have good news for you; today is a new beginning! Don’t wait until you “feel” like forgiving; because frankly, you probably never will. Instead, decide to forgive. Why not start today?
This article has been adapted from Paula's book, "The Man You Always Wanted is the One You Already Have" (Multnomah, 2007). Paula is a member of Church on the Mountain, a vibrant community of believers in Crowley Lake. www.ChurchOnTheMountain.org
Unforgiveness is the trash that can smell up your marriage. Even though hurt feelings make it tempting to hold a grudge, it’s important not to let grievances build up. You have to take out the trash, so to speak. The secret to forgiveness is to not wait until you feel like forgiving; because frankly, you probably never will. Instead, decide to forgive. Below you'll find three symptoms of unforgiveness, as well as solutions to tossing it out of your life.
Symptom 1: A hard heart
Your spouse tells you they’re depressed about work, and you think, Whatever… She tells you the doctor say her cholesterol is dangerously high, and you think, Whatever… He tells you he thinks he may be having a mental breakdown, and you think, *yawn* Whatever… The inability for a marriage partner to care about what concerns their spouse is a screaming symptom that unforgiveness has caused their heart to grow cold.
But there’s a Solution. Although you may be tempted to harden your heart toward your husband or wife because they repeatedly hurt your feelings, make an effort to stay in an attitude of forgiveness. Remind yourself that you love your spouse! You may not be feeling deeply loving toward them right now—but choose to make the decision to love and care about what concerns them, in spite of a lack of romantic feelings.
Symptom 2: The silent treatment (also known as the “I’m not punishing him, I’m just not talking to him right now” treatment).
The silent treatment is usually an indicator that a husband or wife has a rap sheet of their spouses past offenses tucked in their hip pocket. In fact, their mate’s behavior has so infuriated them, they have no words left. You could interrogate them for hours under a glaring spotlight in a dingy, smoke-filled room—they’re not talking.
The Solution: Talk… communicate…share…open up. In my twenty-five years of marriage my husband and I have seldom had major change without conflict. If you’re in the habit of giving the silent treatment, begin today to humble yourself, open up, and communicate freely.
Symptom 3: Expecting the worst
As another offense is committed, the husband or wife is almost glad because it’s one more that can be added to an already long list. They’ll pull that list out at an advantageous moment to use as proof of their spouses continual disregard for their feelings.
An attitude of unforgiveness will set us up to expect the worst in our husband or wife. And when we expect the worst, it’s often exactly what we get. Expecting the worst can become like a well-traveled road—it’s familiar, it’s safe, and it protects us from being disappointed…again.
The solution lies in seeking God’s perspective on your mate and “choosing” to search for the good in your husband or wife.
If you’ve found it difficult to forgive in the past—I have good news for you; today is a new beginning! Don’t wait until you “feel” like forgiving; because frankly, you probably never will. Instead, decide to forgive. Why not start today?
This article has been adapted from Paula's book, "The Man You Always Wanted is the One You Already Have" (Multnomah, 2007). Paula is a member of Church on the Mountain, a vibrant community of believers in Crowley Lake. www.ChurchOnTheMountain.org
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
